Homeschool

I Homeschool to Protect My Children from the World’s Standards

I homeschool to protect my children from the world’s standards. I just said that out loud… well, I typed it, and I’m sure I’ll get some grief over it. But it is fact, and I know many of us homeschool for this very reason. So I’m going to just own it. I do shelter my children and try to protect them from the world’s standards.

Socialization

As homeschoolers, we constantly hear how our children won’t be socialized. Well, I’ll be honest, that is the entire point of why many of us homeschool. Okay, maybe not the ENTIRE point, but one of the big points.

I was raised in the public school system. And I know what I was exposed to and what I exposed others to, to be perfectly honest. I’ll just keep it real … I’m protecting my boys from girls like I was.

Surprised?

Don’t be. I have a history, and it is not one I’m terribly proud of. My mother didn’t want another child… and it was obvious. I looked for love in all the wrong places. And made some huge mistakes. I would spend the night with one of my best friends so I could experience the thrill of sneaking out. And what did I do when I was out? Got in even more trouble.

So yes, I am protecting my children from what I personally experienced and all the public school system of socialization has to offer.

God Has a Sense of Humor, I’m Sure of It!

You might be asking why.

Let me share the irony, after my above confession. My oldest son is dating a girl from- wait for it –public school. And honestly, she is precious. Her mom is as fiercely protective as any mama bear I have ever seen. And, ironically, her brother is homeschooled. So I don’t dislike the kids in public schools or private schools. But there is plenty that I don’t like:

I don’t like the system itself.

I don’t like what they teach.

I don’t like how they teach it.

I don’t like what they use to teach.

I hate the fact that God is banned from their campuses.

I don’t like what children are not just exposed to, but almost indoctrinated in…

Sex.

Drugs.

Drinking.

Rebellion.

No thanks.

My kids are not perfect but they are not dabbling in any of those, thank you. They are perfectly normal, partially sheltered, faithful homeschooled boys. And I am very proud of the young men they are becoming. If you asked them, I can guarantee you they would attribute some of that to being homeschooled. Some to their faith. And some to who they are and what they want to do with their lives and having the right priorities (most of the time).

So if anyone is making you feel guilty or second-guess your decision over this whole socialization conversation …

Don’t give in. 

Don’t allow others to have any say or control over your parenting decisions.

Children are little for such a short while.

No, we can’t shelter them their entire lives. We know they will one day grow up and be exposed to the onslaught of the world’s standards. But that attack will come after we have given them a firm foundation. So teach them diligently, moms and dads. Give them the emotional and spiritual tools and a strong foundation in your faith that they will need to go out into this vast chaotic and lost world.

Give them what they need to help them navigate through the world’s landmines, and then watch them thrive because they were properly prepared to make good decisions and to stand up for what they believe in. You won’t regret the time you spent sheltering your children and giving them a firm foundation for living in and being a light to the world.

Is protecting your children from the world’s standards one of your reasons for homschooling too? Share your reasons with me in a comment! 

About the author

Trish

Trish is one of the owners of Hip Homeschool Moms. She has been married to her best friend, David, for 20 years and they have three sons (ages 17, 16 and 14). Trish is from the coast of North Carolina, but they now live in rural West Tennessee on a 40+ acre farm. She has been homeschooling since 2009 and her homeschool style leans towards a Montessori approach with a heavy emphasis on hands-on learning. They also own a small business that Trish runs from home. Trish’s family is Messianic and they love studying the Scriptures, learning Hebrew and growing in their faith and walk daily. In her spare time, Trish loves to write, work in their garden and can regularly be found trying to learn something new, modeling that learning is indeed a life-long endeavor!

23 Comments

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  • Trish this is one of the best articles I have read in a long time. You were so honest and raw and I love that. I could not have said that any better. Thank you for this

  • This is exactly how many of us feel…and feel like we can not say it. When someone asks me why I homeschool, this is what I want to say, but I know how explosive it would be if I said it. Well done!

    • Thanks Kim! I know… I really want to encourage all of us homeschool moms to remember that God calls us to be different. To stand out. To not fit in. To be peculiar and to not look like the world and love the things the world loves. Instead to love what God loves and hate what God hates. I appreciate the encouragement.

  • Yes! I totally agree with you on this. I am new to homeschooling, my boys are 6,4, and 2. I love to read the blogs of other homeschooling moms and I enjoyed reading a little about you. Thanks! 🙂

    • Thanks Sarah!! I have three boys also and they are that close in age too!! But mine are now 18, 16 and 14. The days seem long but the years fly by!! So glad you are starting the homeschool journey! You won’t regret it!!

  • My husband and I and our public schooled child are proof that your child can both get the most academically and socially out of public school and avoid the things most parents are afraid of in public schools: drinking, drugs, early sexual experimentation. And in our experience she is not an exception. It’s called communicating every day with your child about your expectations for her and modeling your expectations constantly, limiting use of social media and other negative influences whether it’s popular or not, and really paying attention to what’s going on in the world of young people today It can be done, but a lot of parents I have known are too afraid to investigate and say no. It takes time, patience, and energy, but can be done. I think parents should do what’s right for their child and family, but it is just as annoying for me to hear about the (exaggerated) horrible state of public schools as it is for homeschooling parents to be criticized for their choices.
    Why not be honest about your concerns about your children in today’s world? Public school parents worry about the same things.

    • As a former public school teacher who taught in one of the best schools in our county, I can vouch for what Trish is trying to say. Especially in high school, children are being brainwashed to believe liberal policies that only favor the state and not individual thought. I was one of maybe 3 teachers who were outwardly conservative. I would get in trouble for talking about the negative effects of Obama’s policies while the liberal teachers got free reign to speak negatively about Christianity (or as the history teacher liked to put it, the “flying spaghetti monster”). Never would he get in trouble. I was called into the office several times because I did not agree with the state’s ideas of progressive policies. Many students would come to me and tell me how a few particular teachers would try to talk them out of having faith in God. It’s a sad state of affairs and having been on the inside for several years, would never subject my daughter to the public school teachings. It’s a different world from when we grew up in times when a moment of silence was allowed every morning and parents supported the teachers instead of their children, who were allowed to run amok. Thankfully there are great parents like you who stay involved in their children’s lives. But that is no longer the norm as moms go to work all day and family divorce rates climb.

      • Thanks Laura for your insight! It is indeed a different school system than we grew up in (and that school system back then was not all that great).

  • Trish great article. I started working with homeschool families when I was in grad school studying theology. I still work with homeschool families today. I get conflicted and maybe you can help me. How does protecting us from the world standards impact our evangelism and call to go into the world and change it? If the Holy Spirit lives in us doesn’t that mean the world can’t influence us ? Just curious . Loved that article and your deep convictions! Very nice work!

    • Thanks for visiting our website Steven. I agree with you 100% … when referring to adults. The Bible tells us to teach our children diligently … not outsource that responsibility to anyone. Look at how many children lose their faith when they go off to college. I would venture to say it is because they don’t have that firm foundation laid before they are exposed to the world’s standards. I don’t condemn families for sending their children to school. That is a choice they make and I pray that they are doing the very best they can for their children. So no condemnation from us. But the argument about being salt and light does not hold water when you look in Scripture. I don’t see one single passage that calls children into the mission field at a young age. They are not even counted in the census until they are 20 (Numbers 1:3). Verses about teaching our children well: Proverbs 1:8-9; Deuteronomy 6:7; Ephesians 6:1-4; Deuteronomy 11:18-19; Titus 2 and many more. I appreciate your thoughtful question and pray that you see my heart and desire to respond honestly about why I feel so strongly about homeschooling. Blessings~

    • Great question and response. I used to feel that if we took our children out of PS who would be there as the light. As I matured and had children in school I started digging in more and found that we can’t send children into the fight and expect them to come home unscathed. We must lay a truly strong foundation on which they can stand and that takes time and more than Sunday School can provide.

  • This is very well said. I struggle with trying to explain my reasons to friends and family and it always comes out wrong. Btw first time commenting on a online post about an article ever. I’m going to save and use this as my motivation!

    • Janelle!! I feel so honored to be the first post you ever commented on!! Thank you! You know sometimes it feels like we are writing and it evaporates into thin air because readers don’t realize how much it means to us to get feedback! So thanks for just stepping out there and commenting!! And thanks for your support and kinds words about my article. You know when you open up your own history and share something so personal… you feel really vulnerable!! I’m glad you are here and a part of our community!

  • Yes! This is what I WANT to say. Who cares if I’m trying to shelter them from the world!? God put them in my care and He won’t hold responsible all the naysayers for how my kids turned out. We’ve enjoyed the benefits of both homeschool and public school for our eldest, and both my husband and I were public schooled. We live in a very rural area and when we sent our son to public school for first grade, the strongest thing he learned was NOT academic. In 2 months he learned “every man for himself” when at home we were teaching, “put others first”. He went from playing with his little sister and helping her to calling her “stupid” and wanting to fist fight her. We are still (3 years later) overcoming some of the regular, everyday public school stuff.

    For the gentleman who commented: thank you for an honest request for information. Us homeschoolers aren’t often given that opportunity but are immediately met with criticism from friends and family. As far as the Holy Spirit living in us…Praise God for that! Unfortunately, I still get “the world“ on me from living in it, and I have been a Christian for 20 years. For a child (Christian or not) who spends 8 hours a day with people who aren’t like-minded and only get 3 hours with family if they go to after-care, my heart breaks. If you’re someone who sends your child to public school and your influence has remained greater than the world’s, that is AWESOME! I’d love to hear how you do it. I don’t believe all Christians should homeschool. It’s not for everyone. To be honest, many days I’d like to send mine to a teacher. But, the academic standard is important too. My 3rd grader was telling my husband about Joseph Stalin the other day, from a children’s book he picked up at the library. And he’s not socially awkward either. We regularly get compliments for how well our children behave, interact with others, respond to authority, and how smart they are. I’m not saying this to brag but to remind myself why I homeschool. Many days it is a struggle, but it something we feel very strongly about. It would be easy to send them to school (and I threaten it), but homeschool is SO rewarding!! Also, the easiest thing is not usually the best thing. Childhood passes so quickly and won’t slow down just because mother doesn’t have time.

    My oldest 2 love to learn and I can witness the unique interests God has given each. A love for learning is not something you can pick up from public school, no matter how hard you try.

    • Thanks Candace for taking the time to reply!! I am closing in on the end of homeschooling career. I have an 18 year old who is doing a gap year this year (but still doing dual enrollment) and going to Israel. A 17 year old who is a senior and will do a gap year too. And a 14 year old who just entered high school. Time does not slow down! I already miss them and they are still here.

  • As a homeschooler, several public school moms have approached me inquiring about homeschooling their highschooler. They have told me how their kids are frustrated with the public school system classroom environment. I have heard from several moms how during class kids are dancing on the tables, throwing things, on their phones, talking, and the teacher has no control of the classroom. One mom told me how her daughter used her cell phone to record what her classes were like. She told her mom that school was a waste of her time. Many parents also complained that sex in the bathrooms is a huge problem. One told me that her son walked in on kids having sex. My nephew said that he was offered drugs numerous times while at school. Our city has about 60,000 people and is a nice place to live. I can only imagine what is happening in larger cities.

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