5 New Year’s Resolutions to Inspire Moms

I am not a huge fan of New Year’s resolutions. I’m not sure I’ve ever kept one. In fact, I pretty much stopped making them years ago. Of course, my New Year’s resolutions usually involved losing weight (usually by joining Weight Watchers on January 1) and exercise (usually by joining a gym I rarely visited after about January 15).

However, this year I began pondering the idea that perhaps there were some resolutions that as a mom I need to make (and keep) in order to be a better mom. To that end, I came up with a list of 5 New Year’s Resolutions to inspire moms. I hope they inspire you to connect more with your family in the new year!

New Year's Resolutions for Moms

Say yes more often.

I believe that all too often, moms say no for the sake of saying no. When my son was born, I told myself that I would say “yes”  to him unless I had a really good reason to say “no.”  Today, thirteen years later, while I can’t say I have always been a  “yes mom,” I do think my attempt to be one is appreciated by my son. I don’t know why it is so difficult for many moms to say yes more. It might be a measure of control, or a lack of willingness to allow messes, or fear of what will happen if we are too permissive. Whatever the reason, try putting them aside in 2014 and watch your relationships with your kids blossom.

Purpose to connect with each child every day.

I know it’s easier said than done. Even with one child, it can be a challenge to make sure I dedicate a portion of my day to him. Something I started this past year was giving him permission to approach me at any time during the day to request 30 minutes of my time. He has the assurance that if at all possible, I will stop whatever I am doing and give him that time. Sometimes, we play a game or read a book. Other times we might just chat, or he’ll have something he’s been working on that he wants to share. I find that he doesn’t always need this time every day, and that’s just fine; he knows I’m here and available to him at a moment’s notice. He knows I value spending time with him.

Eat dinner together every day, as often as possible.

Have you noticed that in this day of busyness, families don’t seem to be sharing meals together as much? I remember as a child, it was usual that no matter what went on during the day, we were expected to be home for dinner. I have such great memories of those family dinners where the events of the day were discussed. I think we have to fight harder for this time today; there is so much competition for our time and attention. However, it is worth the effort to make dinner time sacred for your family, even if that means making different choices for outside activities. If you absolutely cannot make dinner work, then eat breakfast together.

Date your husband.

If there’s anyone that gets neglected in most families, it is Dad. Being a mom is demanding, time-consuming, exhausting. I know that in my years as a mom there have been many nights when I just wanted Dad to come home and take over. The thought of doing anything special for him was the last thing on my mind. But moms, we have to nurture and protect our time with our husbands. Consider once a week date nights. Even if tucking the kids in early and watching a movie together is all you can muster or afford, find a way to make it happen. It is one simple way you can connect with your husband regularly and give him that special time he deserves. It really does make us better moms to be better wives.

Take time for yourself.

It doesn’t have to be a weekend away, or even a whole day to yourself, but, moms, do take time to recharge. Get up earlier than the kids for some quiet time, meet a friend for lunch on Saturday afternoon, lock yourself in your room to read for a couple of hours (or take a nap!), take a long bubble bath, or exchange babysitting one afternoon a week (or even a month!) with a friend. Do something that lets your family see that you are important, too. This isn’t about getting “away from the kids” or being selfish, this is simply your time of refreshment. We all need it. It is okay to indulge. There you go — 5 New Year’s resolutions for moms and not one mention of dieting or  exercise! How about that? Happy New Year, Friends! I pray you are richly blessed in 2014! Now, tell me, do you make New Year’s resolutions? I would love to hear what you hope to accomplish in the new year.

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  1. This is a great list of suggestions for making 2014 a better year. I’m definitely guilty of telling my kids no far more than I should. It actually has more to do with the fighting that ensues when I say yes than messes or really anything else. If they would learn to get along when I do say yes to things they want to do, I would definitely probably say yes a whole heck of a lot more! (Regardless, my kids are spoiled rotten though.)

    I definitely agree that couples need to make time for each other. I talk about that all the time on my blog it seems. It’s the most important relationship besides the one you have with God. Your kids are going to grow up and move out, if you don’t have a relationship with your husband now it’s going to be really hard to enjoy life when they move out. Not to mention, my kids take notice of how loving their Dad and I are all the time. They take great assurance in knowing we kiss, hug, and sneak off to be ‘together’. My kids are quick to tell you that even if we fight they know we’ll work it all out in the end because we love each other to much to be apart. Our kids gladly go to bed at their bedtimes because they know it’s Mommy and Daddy’s date time afterwards.
    Of course, on the flip side, all of my kids expect to have date time with Mommy at least once a week too. They look forward to their one on one time with me. Granted most of the time it’s just us cuddled up watching a movie and munching on some snack, but they treasure that time.

  2. “say yes more” – That’s one I really needed to hear! It certainly takes a purposeful effort, because it’s so easy to automatically say no. Thanks for this reminder, Marcy 🙂

    1. you do have to make yourself stop and think for a minute before answering. I think for most of us, it’s a natural inclination to just say no — because it’s easier.

      wish that was my natural inclination in other areas of my life! Ironic, huh??

  3. These are great resolutions! I know that trying to say “yes” whenever possible and having family dinner almost every night have been so good for our family. I am seeing the benefits of my commitment to take time for myself as I’ve concentrated on doing that consistently. And I probably need to work a little harder at the other two – dates and one-on-one time with each of my kids. Those are real challenges in our busy family’s world, especially as the kids get older.

    1. I think those are the hardest ones, too, because they are not quick and sometimes require planning or unwanted interruptions. it’s worth it though!

  4. Oh, I love these Marcy! #3 is big one for us. Right now, our table doesn’t fit all of us. One of our goals for this year is to get a bigger table, so we can all eat TOGETHER.

  5. I am not a New Year’s resolution kind of gal either Marcy since my list of resolution could be massive, daunting, overwhelming, and just not feasible for any human being, LOL. I would much rather work on the current goals for today and then once that goal is completed start working on my next goal.

    All of these goals are so important but very doable in our busy day to day lives. I love your list of goals for Moms. Sometimes it is so easy to forget to take time out each day not just as a family unit but also individually with each child to reconnect with them. Great article!

  6. These are great. I really like the idea of allowing the children to approach you at any time to request your undivided attention. With 4 children, that is sometimes difficult, but it is something that I definitely need to work on. I’m also very adamant about us eating dinner together every day. 🙂

    1. that one has been the most life changing for us. Ben uses it almost every day. it keeps us connected, even when my schedule feels overwhelming!

      we’re still working on the dinner thing here.

  7. These are wonderful reminders!

    I try really hard to be a yes kind of mom. I do pretty good in this area. I do however need to make sure to connect with each of the kids daily. This is very important to me and something I have been thinking about a lot lately. We eat dinner together almost every night. Brian and I NEVER have dates. I have been thinking about making it a priority at least monthly this year. Me time? What is that!? 😉

  8. These are far better resolutions than most make every year! I’m writing a post in the next few days about resolutions, and I think I’ll link on over to yours and just say “And this please.” 😉

  9. I love this list, Marcy. It seems I’ve gotten busier as I have fewer kids at home to homeschool- work, church, house re-build, etc. And most moms my age are empty nesters so folks think I’m casting about for something to do (insert hysterical laughter). I’m purposing to spend time with the kids every day- really “seeing” them and interacting with them rather than just assigning tasks or hurrying them along. And to eat at the table more often as a family. Thanks for writing out what God has been speaking to my heart. A great list for a New Year!

  10. I love how these are not your typical resolutions! Especially love that they are all about building relationships and showing care – to others and ourself. Excellent ways to cultivate a good life in 2014!

  11. Loved these resolutions, Marcy! The Lord has been helping me to notice that love and relationship with my family need to be my top priority in 2014. I love them amazingly….but I needed that reminder from Him to ensure that my activities and priorities reflect that love.

    It is exciting to see that God is moving in similar ways in other dear families!

  12. As always, your writing is beautiful and heartfelt. Thank you for sharing thoughtful ideas that will encourage and challenge me to be a better mom. I appreciate all of your suggestions but love the one about dating your husband because, you are right – he is often the one left out, especially when he works an uncommon schedule. Thank you for the lovely post!

    1. thank you, Lori. your words are so sweet. we have an uncommon schedule here as well. this is the area where we need to most work as well.

  13. Love those resolutions Marcy. I’ve been trying to do more of those things each day also. My hubby and I were just discussing a dinner date last night. My daughter loves spending one on one time with me so we’ve been doing more mom and daughter things together. I need to relish this time with her.

  14. I want to be a “yes mom” but I fall into the trap of “Yes…we’ll get to it” and I don’t always follow through. Thank you for the reminder to be more purposeful and consistent and open to my kids requests and needs.

    1. I have fallen into that same trap. But I’m learning that it’s a habit I’m teaching to my son. Nothing helps more than seeing your own mistakes turned back on you.

  15. I always make them, but they rarely make it past March. January to March is a lovely improvement though, so it’s never wasted. My resolutions seem to stack up on me, as I see more and more the things I want to improve in my habits. This year, rather than focusing on doing more and doing better, my focus in myself and with my family is to HUSH. Step back and do less. To hush and listen and stop and savor. We’ve made some specific goals for staying home more and making purposeful do nothing time together. I think this might finally be a resolution we can keep…hopefully for the rest of our lives. I briefly talked about it here: http://www.simblissitycottage.com/2013/12/hush.html

  16. Love it. I’m not a huge resolution person either but goals are good and the New Year is always a popular and good time to renew and refresh. I think you make some good suggestions for goals. We regularly eat together as a family and my husband and I were just talking about doing better at ‘dating” this year. I could use a little reminder to say a little more “yes” since some days I feel like all i say is “no” so good point there and taking time for myself is something I tell myself every year that i’ll do better with and usually don’t. We’ll see how that goes. Thanks for the great post.

  17. These are all great suggestions. I’m not one to make resolutions, either, but I do hope to accomplish a lot in 2014 – including being a better wife and mom, so I will definitely be using your suggestions!

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