In the daily shuffle of a homeschool mom’s life – math, reading, discipline, chores, errands, and more – it’s easy to take our marriages for granted. Our husbands work hard so we can have this cherished time dedicated to our children; they deserve our attention too! Here are a few easy ways to let your husband know he’s appreciated and strengthen your homeschool marriage.(For all those single homeschooling moms – an extra round of applause to you! You deserve it.)
Priorities – According to Him
No matter how hard we try, we can’t do it all. That means we have to choose what goes on the top of the to-do list, and what can wait until tomorrow. We need well laid priorities. But our priorities as a homeschool mom might be vastly different from our husbands’. Ask your husband: “If I can only accomplish TWO household chores a day, what two would you most appreciate?” And put those on the top of the list. This was a lesson I learned the hard way. But it has made the biggest difference in our home.
I love to cook! Early in our marriage, I would spend exorbitant amounts of time cooking elaborate meals for my hubby. The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, right? Not necessarily. The way to my man’s heart is an organized home and clean clothes hanging in the closet. My husband will take fish sticks over Beef Wellington any day if it means he doesn’t have to trip over toys or hunt though laundry baskets of clean clothes. What’s important to your husband?
Well Rounded Conversations
Since homeschooling takes a lot of time, effort and planning, we moms can end up wearing “homeschool goggles”. These goggles are big and thick and tinge the entire world around us with learning opportunities. For the most part, that’s a very good thing. However, when we look at the world only through our homeschool goggles, it leaves little else for us to talk about. Our husbands married dynamic women with varied interests. Do you have other interests today? Or have you put yourself in a homeschool box?
I’ll be honest. Lately, I’ve been in a homeschool box. It’s been a busy season of life (and that’s okay!). While my husband hasn’t complained, I noticed our conversations became about three things: kids, homeschool and the latest minor crisis. So I made an effort to take off the goggles and round out our conversations. My husband married a dynamic woman with many interests! I want him to see that part of me, often.
Input – Let Him Have It
Does your husband have input on what or how you’re teaching the children? Even if hubby isn’t involved in the day-to-day schooling, he might have good ideas on how or what to teach! Pick his brain. In general, husbands like to “fix things” and feel valued when they can help. Ask hubby to give you, the teacher, a balanced “report card.” Where do you excel? What have you done well? What needs improvement? Then implement his advice as best you can.
I’ve found, since I’m the main teacher, it’s far too easy for me lose the big picture and get discouraged. My husband however, has a more objective view of our homeschool. He can see when we’re burning out and need more field trips. He’s good at reminding me (when I feel like a failure) that our kids are getting a good education and that character training is worth more than all the long division in the world. What strengths does your husband add to your homeschool?
What easy ways do you let your husband know he’s valuable?
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