The Shape of My Love

Today’s article was written by Craig, the husband of Hip Homeschool Moms team member, Taryn. We are so happy to share a post written by a homeschooling dad, and we hope it’s encouraging to all of you moms who work hard to homeschool while doing everything else you do! Thank you, Craig, for sharing this article with us! ~The HHM Team

My wife has curves, and I love them – both for what they are, as well as what they symbolize to me.

Let me explain…

We are a pretty healthy family, without being sports or exercise freaks.  That means that while we love our outdoor fun in the sun, we also enjoy some of the ‘cheats’ in life like carbs, ice-cream and, of course, chocolate.  I am in the gym at least three times a week, and my wife usually gets a morning run in two or three times a week – all while we try to balance out our schedule and responsibilities.  What that means is that we are reasonably in shape, but we are hardly going to be on the cover of a sports magazine in our swimsuits.

What it means for my wife in particular is that, while she does exercise when she can, she always feels like she would like to do more.  Between homeschooling our four kids, running the Mom’s taxi service to extracurricular activities and back, and making sure that our family eats a meal sitting at the dining room table most nights a week, she is not left with a huge amount of time for herself – especially since the evenings are the only time that she and I get to have some adult conversation and de-stress time.  So my wonderful wife sits somewhere slightly (really, slightly) upward of her goal weight, and has a beautiful, curvy, female body because of it – and I am far from complaining.

For me, those curves represent the sacrifice that she is making on a daily basis to ensure that our family is taken care of; they represent the love and care she has for my children and their well-being; and they represent the selflessness of her attitude toward the things that she would love to spend more time on but cannot necessarily fit into her crammed-up days.  Those curves on the outside represent the beauty on the inside, and that makes them all the more attractive to me.

In addition, in listening to a sermon series recently, I was reminded that men should always consider their wife their standard of beauty, and not get caught into comparing with the contemporary look of the models and actresses that the world will hold up as the pinnacle of beauty.  That will always be a trap for those who are planning on getting old together in the security of a marriage, where both partners will age and will carry on enjoying each other despite them getting older and wrinkled.  We, as husbands, should cherish the wife we have been given, and despite changing shape and size, always consider her your standard of beauty.  So my curvy wife, who may not always be happy with the couple of extra kilograms she feels she is carrying, is my standard of beauty now, and I plan on it being that way for the rest of our lives.  Our marriage has had seasons where we have had more time to spend exercising, and my wife has run a few half-marathons in the past few years as evidence to that, but when there is a season of little spare time for her, then because of where her time is going and the fact that she is the one for me, those curves become my new standard of beauty, and I love them all the more.

And believe me, I am really not complaining…



Craig Hayes is married to team member Taryn Hayes.  They live in Cape Town, South Africa, together with their four children.  Like plenty of homeschooling dads, Craig works outside of the home at a regular daytime job.  But when he is home, he enjoys spending time with the family, reading aloud a current favorite, making breakfast pancakes for the kids or taking them out to the mountains for a scorpion-hunting hike.   Above all, he is grateful to God for His grace and forgiveness through Jesus Christ.

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  1. I’m so pleased to hear a man speak in such a loving way about his wife. My husband and I are both thicker than we were when we first got married. However, he’s never once made me feel unattractive due to weight gain having four kids. There were times I’d slim down close to my early marriage weight and he’d say things like, he missed my softness or that I was beautiful. That’s true love.

  2. I really love that you wrote this. Thanks Craig. Both Taryn and I are blessed to have husbands that look beyond the outside and value what God values. That security only makes us wives love our husbands more.

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